Today’s post is a collaboration with our wonderful friend
I’m excited because this collaboration means a lot to me and I’m glad that Bay took the time to answer some questions. Make sure you go and check out her post featuring me!!!! You’ll love it.
Anyway enjoy and comment down below what you thought.
Love from Jade. Do you have brown skin like I do? If so, do you receive racism?
I actually don’t. I have light skin but it’s a little tan in the summer. But oh my in 5th grade, I was insanely bronze because of Canada’s sun at the time. My teacher made a few comments towards my skin but he always teased me anyways so no, I never received racism directly.
What’s the most racist thing that someone told you?
Nothing I can think of so far.
Do you think wearing the hijab should be a choice?
Government-wise, I think hijab shouldn’t be forced because then women wear it for the wrong intentions. But honestly the free clothing rule got kind of out of hand in the West and now people go out half naked so I think places who still have religion should make the dress code a little stricter than V cuts and shorts.
What do you think of girls like me who have liberal parents who don’t force them to wear the hijab?
My parents haven’t forced me into it either so I definitely support parents who don’t force their girls to wear it but rather encourage and support instead.
DO you think that it’s okay for Muslim men to have more than 1 wife?
Personally for me, this is no-no. My husband cannot marry another wife over me like sis imma file the divorce papers and I will make this clear before we get married. But it is permissible in Islam and I know some rich men in some cultures do it and the women are fine with it so that’s their choice and they’re allowed up to 4 wives. The thing is, back in the day this was more necessary due to war times and the decrease in male population. Plus, there were reasons like a woman was sick or old or couldn’t get a child. And sometimes there are cases where men cheat or there’s an open relationship so more wives was made to prevent that.
DO you believe in forced/arranged marriage?
Nope! I know some cultures do it but culture is different than religion and marriage against your will is never good. My parents would never do it to me and I would never do it to my children. I think it’s fine if I know a family or a man who would be good for my daughter and maybe suggest but other than that, if she doesn’t say yes, then that’s her choice!
DO you think that muslums should marry other Muslims? Or do you think that Muslims can marry who’m ever they want?
Technically, Muslim men can marry a jew or a christian but Muslim women can only marry a Muslim. I know this sounds bad but usually in a marriage, the man is more in control and he might do things that are forbidden in Islam like drinking and drugs and it might harm you as well. For me, I’d prefer to have a Muslim because I know he’d share my values and we’d be on the same page in terms of raising children. Plus, I wouldn’t have to be alone when saying “yeah I can’t eat pork” at dinner invitations haha. I just think it would be much better for the woman.
What age do you want to get married?
25 or 26? After I’m done school and once I find a job. I want to get a kid before 30 though so yeah!
Is there any people in your family you suspect that are gay?
No. My brothers are super open with me and they’re 100% straight. No one in my family is and it might be because of the morals we were raised with and that my whole family are strict Muslims who definitely have a good time but pray and follow all the rules as well. They were very educated in terms of religion and things like that.
IF you were out with someone in your family and you saw another Muslim is being bullied for being gay would you stop it and defend them?
For sure! I don’t agree with their action but they don’t need to recieve violence from other people. They are no less than I am so why would I treat them differently? Also by “being gay” is that like obvious intercourse with the same gender on the street type of thing? In that case, I’d step up but get an adult with me in case things get out of hand if the people are grown up.
What would you tell your parents if one of your siblings came out as gay?
Um they probably won’t but I’d tell my parents to stay patient and maybe to advise them. I can’t do much about it because it’s their own decision and they’ll be accountable for it but because I have an influence on my siblings, I’d definitely talk it out and listen to what they have to say. I always check up on my siblings though so they aren’t really keeping anything inside.
Do you think that Muslim girls should be allowed to have sex before marriage?
No and same with Muslim boys. It’s not right and has been mentioned multiple times in the Quran not to so waiting for marriage isn’t a problem for me. Plus, it teaches you patience and commitment. I’ll make a separate post on this but great question.
DO you pray 5 times a day?
Does your opinion of me change if you found out that I as a Muslim don’t fast?
Not necessarily. It is a pillar of Islam so if you miss it on purpose without a valid reason then I think a lot of your faith might be shaky but that’s not for me to judge. I’d advise you to repent and maybe start again with baby steps (eg. fasting once a week) and to build your way up from there. Plus fasting has so many benefits to the body and it teaches you patience so I don’t see why not unless you have physical issues. But everyone’s going through something so I’m not going to treat you any different.
DO you think that Muslim parents should be more open with their kids about topics such as mental illness, and LGBT issues?
I know my parents aren’t too open about LGBT issues because everyone’s clear on the fact that it’s wrong and we were born straight in the family so I’m not sure what there is to talk about. As for mental health, my parents do an amazing job at being a great support system for us and I think parents should raise their kids with love and respect because as we grew, I knew that my parents were my rock and that I wouldn’t be the same without them. My parents don’t talk much about mental health but they definitely let us know they’re here through actions and I think other Muslim parents should love their children more as well.
DO you think that parents should let their kids be as creative as they please? For example, letting them becomes youtubers, and other creators?
Honestly my parents don’t care what we grow to become. They’re open to anything as long as it makes a living. My mom definitely wants us girls to work but I know some parents are a little less strict on the girl’s occupation because they can get married and the man can provide (culture-wise) so yeah, parents should let their kids follow their passion but also within limits so that they are able to support themselves.
What do you think of Muslim parents who choose to abandon their disabled children? Should they get punished?
DEFINITELY! Parents should not abandon their children for no reason and especially disabled kids. When a kid is disabled, it is a sort of trial for the kid and family so parents can’t just opt out of that. Kids and marriage are a big part of life and parents must do their best to provide for their kids and pass on the future generation. I believe abandoning is a sin if there was no extreme reason behind it.
Do you believe in heaven and hell?
Do you think that gay people are going to hell for being themselves?
Aah the way you phrase the question. I’m not the judge for who goes to hell but God warned many times to not engage in homosexual activity and if people went against that and had no fear of God’s authority then I’m not sure where they’ll end up. This happened to a generation before and God’s messenger, Lut, gave many warnings but no one listened until a natural disaster came to flip that nation upside down. I feel like it’s very normalized these days but there’s time to repent and change and not act on things that were not made permissible in this life.
If a Muslim girl gets pregnant in high school what should their parents do?
This is a tough question but I think she should get married to the baby’s father right away. They decided to engage in sex before marriage so if a baby comes from it, they shouldn’t abandon the baby and try their best to raise it together. It will definitely be tough but I guess now you know why God made it forbidden. It’s a test to the whole family and as a parent, I’ll help raise the kid because it’s innocent but I’d be a little disappointed in my daughter (or son if he got a girl pregnant) because I know she could’ve done better.
Do you believe in abortion?
I believe it’s wrong unless it has a physical or mental effect on the mother that may cost the mother’s life (eg. the mother is going to die in delivery or she’s going to kill herself out of depression). The mother is the priority over the fetus in this case. Other than that, it was meant to be if there was no miscarriage and don’t ever kill a child out of financial need because God ensures that it’ll be okay even with a financial struggle and I’ve heard that many times when a baby is born, the family gets blessed with a better job..etc. So you can’t assume that you can’t afford it and kill the baby. We were once a potential life too and our parents didn’t abort us so why would we take a life from someone else?
Finally who’s your biggest inspiration?
My mother! She’s so strong and I would literally be honoured to be half as good as she is. And Noor Tagouri because she’s so driven and motivated and ugh I love everything she does!!
Thank you for having me, Jade. I really enjoyed answering these!!